Psalm 107:1 Give thanks to The Lord for He is good.

Happy Thanksgiving! 

As I was washing my Rapunzel hair this morning (which for those of you that truly know me, you know that is a huge deal) I started thinking "what am I thankful for?" and then the idea clicked to write a blog post. As I am still washing my hair (side note; there is so stinkin much of this that I have plenty of time to think, hence the Rapunzel reference) I continued to think about what I would write about, but the thought also came to mind "why do you write?" and the answer to that was "to get the Lord's name out there, not my own." As much as I love having over 2000 views on my blog, and lots of likes, comments, and positive feedbacks... that is not my purpose for this blog. If I reach one person with this blog than it has served its purpose. As I continue to follow my calling to write today, I am thankful for so many things.


Give thanks to The Lord for He is good. 

Psalm 107:1 Oh give thanks to the LORD, for he is good, for his steadfast love endures forever!

Psalm 118:1 Oh give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; for his steadfast love endures forever!

Psalm 136:1 Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good, for his steadfast love endures forever.

1 Chronicles 16:34 Oh give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; for his steadfast love endures forever!

the key words I pull out of those 4 scriptures are he is good. 

Is.

Is, is the present tense of be. 

Present tense. That means He is good now. How cool is that to think about?

When you think about How good the Lord is now and all the time. I think it makes it a little bit easier to have a thankful heart. 

In this month of thanksgiving, if you read a daily devotional or you get the verse of the day from some source, it is all about giving the Lord thanks and why that is so important, at least my Jesus Calling devotional was on point with that this month and I loved it. 

He has blessed me beyond words. & I truly believe if you have an attitude of thanksgiving in every situation, and you remember that The Lord is good and works all things together for our good, that your valleys will be just as sweet to walk through as your mountain tops.

Here is an example of that;

A couple of Thursday's ago at Vertical @ Biltmore Baptist, we were to turn and tell someone what we were thankful for. I turned to an unfamiliar face behind me and said "I am thankful for my family." He without hesitation responded "Wow, you must have a pretty awesome family." To which I said back "If you only knew." 

In my mind I was thinking.. if you only knew the hurt I have walked through. If you only knew my story. If you only knew how crazy times were. If you only knew how things have changed over 23 years. If you only knew how much fun we have & how our pretty cool our relationships are today. 

Because I have a thankful heart and I know that The Lord is good, I can see that everything I walked through with my family was all a part of His plan for good. Of course at the time I could not see how any of the chaos could ever be considered "good" But bless, am I thankful for every single step of life I have walked through with my family and sweet friends I have by my side. It was all part of God's plan for good in my life and it has shaped me into the woman I am today; with a strong love for the Lord and a heart of thanksgiving. 

If I had to guess, there are more than enough people walking through that part of life right now. Maybe it isn't your family issues. Maybe it's a job, another broken relationship, or a missing relationship. There is a blessing in it somewhere. The cool thing that I like to think about often is that everything I have been through, everything I currently go through, everything I will go through, every breath & every step I take was perfectly hand crafted especially for me. So all of this stuff, because the Lord is good was picked out and planned for your good because He loves you more than words could ever explain. 

I truly believe that when you taste & see that word of the Lord is good, and that He is good, and that he is working things all together for your good... those valleys you walk through will eventually become so much sweeter to you than those mountain tops. 

You can tell me, "well you don't know my story.. you don't know me"  & I can tell you that you are exactly right. But I know somebody who does. I know the One who breathed you into creation. I know the One who had all of your days planned before you were created. I know that He is good and that He wants good for you and that He has a blessing and silver lining in that dark cloud in that dark valley you are stuck in. 

"Let thankfulness rule in your heart. As you thank The Lord for blessing in your life, the more you will see. Focus on The Lord and what He is doing. Sing to God with a heart of gratitude." -- Jesus Calling 

You may be weak, but God's spirit is strong in you. Give thanks frequently as you journey through today.   Rejoice always,  pray without ceasing,  give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 

So I know I don't have a list here of what I am thankful for, but I hope what you take out of this is that I am thankful for everything. 

Again, Happy Thanksgiving! Enjoy your plates full of food you know you shouldn't eat. Enjoy your loud aunt, crazy cousins, and your uncle with the crude jokes. You don't get to choose your family, but God hand picked them especially for you! 

-B

Sometimes a "no", "do not", or "don't have" is a blessing too

She sat across from me with her hand gently around that red cup, in the seat where her back would be against the wall. She didn't much care to have her back to the room, she liked to be able to see what was going on.

She had answered questions about ministry, her time with The Lord, friendships, and more about her new season of life with her head held high and a smile on her face. With the last question she answered though, something changed so quickly. Her shoulders dropped, her tone changed, and without looking up she said "no, I'm not married."

The quick change was such a shock. From the things she had been saying it was very evident The Lord has blessed her with many many things and had His hand on her. This girl had answered everything so joyfully and then that one question, the answer to that one question she carried the answer around with her in shame.

She had so many blessings, but had she missed that because the enemy had pulled one of the oldest tricks in the book?

Let me explain. Go back with me to the beginning. Not the beginning of this story, but the beginning of The Story. Back to the Garden of Eden.

(There is a lot of scripture here so I won't insert it all, but I encourage you when you have a moment to go read through Genesis 2.)

Let me talk to you about Eve, the very first woman in the Bible, and the very first for the enemy to pull this trick on. 

Eve had a man (companionship).
Eve had 4 rivers flowing through the garden of Eden (water)
Eve had trees, plants, and animals within quick reach (food)
Eve had The Lord's blessing, protection, and perfection surrounding her.

She had it all, but one thing. And here is where the enemy pulls a fast one on her. He places a big ole spot light on the one thing she doesn't have. Using that one thing to distract her and make her think The Lord is holding out on her and does not know what is best for her. There is a reason she doesn't have that one thing in her possession, but she is encompassed in the enemy's trick that she can't see that. 

Sound familiar? See how these two stories are oh so similar? 

From the very beginning this has been a trick of the enemy's. Eve missed all The Lord had blessed her with because she was so focused on that one thing she did not have. She was so distracted by it that she couldn't even trust The Lord and know that maybe He had a reason for keeping that one thing she was lacking away from her. 

The same goes with the girl in the story with her head hung low in shame of the fact she does not have a husband. 

Can I be completely honest with you about something? That girl in the story, remember her? Yeah, that was me. Head hung in shame as soon as somebody asked if I was married. Every single time, my reaction was the same. 

Head hung in shame.
Shame wrapped in thoughts of they will wonder what is wrong with me, and try to figure out why I'm not married. 

Then one day I felt the Lord prick my heart and whisper "you are missing all the other blessings, because you are so focused on what you do not have. Be thankful, and keep your eyes focused on me and what you do have." and with that He placed the story of Eve on my mind. 

After reading and studying what Eve had in the Garden of Eden and how she had fallen prey to the same exact trap I did, it was like my eyes were opened. 

God calls us to be content, not complacent. 
Faithful, focused, and fruitful with what He has given us, not distracted, distraught, and disobedient because there are things He has not given us. 

Don't be so distracted by the do nots that you miss the sweet blessings of Your Heavenly Father. Sometimes a no, do not, or don't have is a blessing too. 

Just as Eve couldn't see that The Lord had a plan and purpose, I couldn't see that He had and has a plan for me too and that "don't have" is a blessing too. 

We all have wants which we feel like are our needs. Yours is probably on the tip of your tongue right now. I challenge you to open your fists and hand it over to The Lord. I challenge you to trust He has a reason for it not being in your life in this season. 

One day He may and you will know God is God and God is good. 
And it may never come but you will know that God is still God and God is still good. 

So friend if you take nothing from this keep this little nugget of truth in the back of your mind ...

Praise Him for what you do have, and  Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith,because the enemy comes to kill steal and destory. (1 Peter 5:8-9 & John 10:10) 

oh the joy of vulnerability

oh the joy of vulnerability

as hard as it may be to convey a tone in writing, I am hoping that you can pick up on my sarcastic tone in that statement.

Joy - a feeling of great pleasure and happiness

Vulnerability (or vulnerable) - susceptible to physical or emotional attack or harm

A feeling of great pleasure and happiness of being susceptible to physical or emotional attack or harm.

 Now are you picking up my sarcasm? Those two just don't go together. At least not in a great pleasurable and happy way.

Have you ever opened up about something, poured our your heart, feelings, thoughts, and emotions only to be met with indifference. Or the cold, hard sting of the words, actions, or feelings you hoped for to never come your way.

To come to that place where you are susceptible to physical or emotional attack or harm? That place where you want to shut off, close down, and never even dream of tip-toeing around that word, vulnerability? 

You have? Me too. 

Lately I have learned there is however a lot of learning, growing, and character development in vulnerability. 

As a quiet, calm (I laugh even typing those two words to describe myself) woman with a strong spirit, vulnerability might as well be a four letter word that catches you off guard when you hear it from somebody else, or a pile of dirty laundry you know exists but avoid it at all costs. 

I don't think it's harder for women than men to be vulnerable, I believe it is an across the board issue.

However, doing some thinking, reading, praying, and researching and actually putting myself in those situations where I've had to be.... vulnerable  has really made me think about how things would be different in my relationships, my ministry, or my discipleship groups if I was more vulnerable.

There is something about being vulnerable that makes you flip. Once you open that bag of vulnerability the fear of man instantaneously flies in. Happened to me, just last night. I won't go into detail about what, why, or who with, but I will say that I had to come to a point where I had to calm it down and try to see the positive side of my vulnerability. Which in turn is why I am writing this post. 

Reading around, I found this quote about that which we avoid, vulnerability from a man named Patrick Lencioni, A man I have never heard of or know anything about. Yet a man who has a good way of seeing how vulnerability is a good thing which is what I am looking for. 

"Vulnerability. It is one of the most undervalued and misunderstood of all human qualities. Without the willingness to be vulnerable, we will not build deep  and lasting relationships in life. That's because there is no better way to earn a person's trust than by putting ourselves in a position  of unprotected weakness." 

I can't help but read that and think of vulnerability and think of Jesus. A man who didn't pretend, wasn't prideful, boastful, but was real. He was an easy to connect with, easy to follow, easy to love, easy to want to be like kind of man. A man who gave us the greatest most amazing things he could, all by being vulnerable. 

That alone takes the sting out of vulnerability. 

How deep and real were Jesus' relationships, ministry, and discipleship? 

I don't know about you, but if having relationships, ministry, and discipleship like Jesus means being a little more vulnerable, i'm in. 

I don't know what that vulnerability looks like in your life. You're probably thinking now you don't know what happened to me the last time I was vulnerable. How stupid it made me feel, how others looked at me... you don't know.  Friend you are correct but I can be vulnerable with you and tell you I've been there. I've kept feelings in and when I opened up about them it was a little too late. I've had to swallow my pride and admit I was wrong. I've had to sit down with a friend who is hurting and broken by something I am all too familiar with and open an old wound so I could meet her where she is all by saying, "you'e not alone, me too..." 

So I don't know what being vulnerable will look like or has looked like in the past for you, but if I can encourage you to give it another try and to help take the sting out of it for you, then that is a start. 

I am by all means not saying please air your dirtiest, darkest secrets on social media, or at any other inappropriate times or ways. I am saying that it is okay to be attentive to a moment you need to open up about feelings, or swallow your pride and admit something, and be brave and follow through. 

I am saying that it is okay to come to a place where you can say "oh the joy of vulnerability" and mean it; and knowing if having relationships, ministry, and discipleship like Jesus means being a little more vulnerable, you too can say "i'm in." 

"God asks us to be this vulnerable all the time – with Him and with others – if we want true joy."

Psalm 21:6 For you make him most blessed forever; you make him glad with the joy of your presence.

One of these days I may hand-write this all out for you, but I wanted it to get to you quickly so maybe you might cry as hard as I did yesterday (misery loves company, right?)

I'm not really big on goodbyes, I'm more of a "see you soon" kind of girl. There is something that is just so heavy about "goodbye", but "see you soon" just does something to ease the heart a little.

But before I say it, there is something you both need to know.

You both for the impact you have had on my life, and I just wanted to take a moment to thank you for that.

Together you both are a power couple for the gospel. You opened your door, your hearts, your ministries, and your families up to me.

You were the first to give me my first real leadership role on ministry. You were the first to show me what a real Christian family and Christian marriage looked like.

You taught me how to parent in a godly way. How to be hospital, to be nice to boys and act like a lady, and how to invest in people and expect nothing in return.

You showed me that I too have a love for the foster care system (well not so much the system, but the children in it) and that blood doesn't make you family.

Monday nights were always my favorite, because even if they were crazy hectic and you needed a 3rd driver to grab kids from appointments, or schools, or practice you did real life with a smile and an open heart.

And there was nothing like snuggling with each of the kids one by one in the chair when I would come back for a visit and we would, as C would say, "have the band back together."

Remember how hard it was for me to leave you guys and go an hour and a half away, and I sent Sadie Anne back to the van balling (which is probably good I didn't hug her goodbye, because we both would be reliving that moment, so I know you'll send her my love)

This moment is about a million times harder to let y'all go even further, but I know you promised my move to Franklin would be good & that The Lord is good so I know this will be good too.

You will forever be family and my spiritual parents, because just like you guys taught me, blood doesn't make family.

So there will be no goodbyes here, just see you soon with lots of FaceTime, texts, calls, and road trips in the near future.

Love you guys! Wish you all the best! 

Proverbs 31:30 charm is deceitful and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears The Lord is to be praised.

I get asked on many occasions if I think before I speak, Maybe that's a sign that I should start to think before I speak, however my response usually is, "no, I like to be just a surprised and entertained at what comes out of my mouth as you are."  I  mean, who doesn't like surprises? 

That being said,  I may be just as surprised as you by what gets written in this post.

Something that has been on my heart for a long time, but more heavily this past week is the world vs The Word in regards to being a woman. 

When God created woman, because after days of creation and 7 times saying "it is good" He found something that WASN'T good.. for man to be alone. 

Now the key thing there is that God doesn't give Adam Eve right then and there. He could have, I mean HELLO he is God. King of ALL creation. But he waits, which is a whole nother blog post. So skipping to the point where God does create Eve for Adam, look at what it says

Genesis 2:21 So The Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs. 

In the worst of my mother "He jacked the dudes rib" 

V22 and the rib that The Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. 

God didn't make the woman from dust like He did the man. 

That there, leads me into my point... The worth of a woman, as The Word says. 

The reason the woman was created was because God did not like that the man was alone. We are a very special creation. The Word tells us we are made for the man. the world tells us we ARE the mans. 

Let me type out the list here that I jotted down in my notes...

 We are, as woman

*an investment not a sacrifice

*worth preparation not just promises

*a gift not a commodity 

*fearfully and wonderfully made! not a mistake

We are also made with very special hearts. We are made for relationships, that is a thumbprint of God on our heart. So many have a desire to marry and I think that concept has been so stolen and destroyed from its original purpose and meaning. 

A marriage between a man and wife is to glorify God. Before a woman can become a kingdom wife that will stimulate not stifle her husbands walk with God is first, she has to figure out her worth in Christ as a single and as a woman. 

Side note, I love Lysa Terkhuerst and all of the many wise things she allows The Lord to use her for. 

But one of my favorite quotes from her is that "no person profession position or possession can ever fill the cup of an empty wounded heart, that is a cup only God can fill" and she is SO true.

But that brings us back to fighting what the world says, that a man can fix all my problems. When I find the right man it'll alllll be okay.

Just FYI for those of you that still believe that, it's a load of crock... 

But because of that load of crock, women search for a husband and all they want is to get married. Our Disney movies and fairly tales tell us so. Movies and society continue to fester that wound as we grow into our teenage years. Pinterest feeds our lust for marriage as young adults. 

Beloved, let me tell you this. No man can ever love you the right way because of the way you have been designed. Our ultimate love is to come from God. You are worthy of more than ONLY the love of an earthly man, and marriage isn't the answer to ANY of your problems. It will never make you feel complete. You know what I bet sucks more than being lonely, having somebody that you can call your husband and share a life with but still feeling more lonely that you ever did before. Once that happens you will be that quarrelsome wife that is talked about in Proverbs 27 & 21. I think a lot of women today need to figure out their worth and who they are in Christ, so that when the chance arises to be a help meet for somebody, they are equipped and prepared to Glorify God as a kingdom wife. 

"A woman is not born a woman nor does she become a women when she marries a man, bears a child, and does their dirty linen, not even when she joins a women's liberation movement --- A woman becomes a woman when she becomes what God wants her to be." -Lady in Waiting

We don't become a woman when we can finally wear lace underwear, put on whatever makeup we choose, purchase push up bras, and wear low rise jeans or high heels. Those are all worldly things that the world mistakes for beauty and womanhood. 

BUT The Word tell us something different about who we are and what we should be concerned with. What makes a godly woman that turns into a Kingdom Wife

"Do not let your adorning be external the braiding of hair and the putting on of jewelry or the clothing you wear but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the IMPERISHABLE beauty of a gentle quiet spirit which in God's sight is very precious." 1 Peter 3:3-4

 "Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain but a woman who fears The Lord is to be praised." Proverbs 31:30

"A wife of noble character is her husbands crown" Proverbs 12:4

"Houses and wealth are inherited from parents, but a prudent wife is from The Lord" Proverbs 19:14

And Proverbs 31:10-31 tells us all about what that looks like.

So I urge you to ask yourself the same question I have asked myself this week, "what is a wife?" And answer it according to what The Word says. Not what the world says.

A wife is not somebody to keep the kitchen busy and the bedroom even busier, and the road between the two hot. Not something to complete a man but to compliment him. Not quarrelsome but prudent and noble. Not a sacrifice but and investment. Not stifling but stimulating in his faith & walk. Not a commodity,  but a gift from God, fearfully and wonderfully made, worth more than just empty promises and words. 

In today's society when there is a battle with the world vs The Word, many let the world win. But beloved I urge you to hold fast to the truth. Taste and see that the word of The Lord is good, and soak in all he has to say about you as a woman. As His daughter. 

You are worthy. Worthy of more than starving yourself, coloring your hair, skin, and nails, and shopping to be what the world says is beautiful. You are worthy of an in-explainable love given by a savior who died on the cross to know & have your heart.

For God IS love. An Unwavering love. (1 John 4:16)

-B